How Can It Be?

“Most blessed are you among women and blessed is the fruit of your womb. And how does this happen to me, that the mother of my Lord should come to me?”  (Luke 1:42-43)

These are Elizabeth’s words to Mary when Mary comes to visit her. The baby in her womb even responded joyfully at Mary’s greeting. It may have seemed to the outside world that it was an ordinary day, Mary came to visit Elizabeth. But Elizabeth, filled with the Holy Spirit, is able to see beyond the ordinary and recognize that this was an extraordinary event, the mother of our Lord was in her presence. How wonderful it would be if we would respond in such a fashion when we realize that God has blessed us with an extraordinary gift. God touches our lives every day yet so often we don’t recognize it. It may seem like an ordinary encounter or we may not even see his presence at all. We may give thanks for the day, for our health, or for our faith but how often do we stop and ponder how gracious God is to us? I think one way to do that is to really enter into the lives of those around us. So often we go through our day either so busy to notice those around us or we have no desire to get involved. But this is the only way to really experience God. When we reach out to those in need we realize how much God has blessed us and the people we are reaching out to may help us realize that we can do without some of the things that we think we can’t live without.

When we aren’t afraid to reach out to those who are hurting we will certainly encounter God. I was reading today about Victor Cruz, the star receiver for the New York Giants, who drove to Newtown, Connecticut to meet the family of one of the children who died in the school shooting. The little boy was buried wearing the No. 80 jersey of his favorite football player. I am sure that some people wondered how it could be that this famous person would go to be with this family. Some may see this as an extraordinary thing, and it was, not because he was famous but because he was being Christ-like. He was willing to reach out to a hurting family. He commented that he wasn’t sure what he was going to say but realized he didn’t need to say anything at all, his presence was enough.

Dear Lord, help me to be more aware of the miracles in my life, help me to have that sense of awe and wonder that Elizabeth had when Mary came to visit. To be in awe that you would bless me with two amazing sons and trust me to care for them. How can this be that the Lord would have that much trust in me? Open my eyes Lord, help me to see all the beautiful ways in which you enter into my life each and every day and see them with a sense of awe and wonder. Amen

Signs

“The LORD spoke to Ahaz: ask for a sign from the LORD, your God; let it be deep as the netherworld or high as the sky! But Ahaz answered, ‘I will not ask! I will not tempt the LORD!’”  (Isaiah 7:10-12)

Here the Lord is telling Ahaz to go ahead and ask him for a sign; ask for something BIG, as high as the sky! Yet Ahaz would not do it. He saw it as something negative. Yet we read in scripture that we are encouraged to ask. “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” (Matthew 7:7) We also see throughout scripture that God uses things as signs of his covenant with mankind. One example is with Noah. God tells Noah, “I set my bow in the clouds to serve as a sign of the covenant between me and the earth.” (Genesis 9:13) When the world makes no sense we often seek a sign from God to help us see the good that can come from tragedy. Only when we turn to God can we transform tragedy into triumph. We can seek wisdom to understand or be angry at God and the world. We often ask God for a sign to know that our loved one is safe with him and He comes through.

“Such is the race that seeks for him, that seeks the face of the God of Jacob.” (Psalm 24:6) This psalm makes me think of all the people in the world who seek signs in everything but the Lord. I know we all feel lost at times but those of us who have opened our hearts to God often seek him for a sign, at times we plead for a sign. After my brother Kevin died in a motorcycle accident at the age of 25, we came across a notebook in his things that had notes and poetry that he wrote. This is part of one of his poems.

Life’s a mystery at least as far as I can see,

don’t understand why I’m here, not sure I want to be.

But who am I to wonder why, who am I to say,

Lord, what is my purpose, why am I here today?

Lord, give me strength, I need a reason to be

Show me the right way, Lord, help me to see.

It touched my heart because it spoke so eloquently of the pain that my brother felt, the same pain that I sometimes feel. It also makes me sad that I never knew that he was hurting this way. But we tend to keep these things hidden, we suffer in silence. We feel that if we doubt God then we don’t really love him. But that is part of being human. When Thomas doubted that Jesus had risen from the dead, Jesus didn’t chastise him he said, here Thomas let me show you, let me help you to believe by allowing you to place your fingers in my nail marks and your hand in my side. Let us open our hearts to the Lord and if we are doubting let us ask him for a sign to increase our faith.

As He Sees Fit

“So has the Lord done for me at a time when he sees fit…”  (Luke 1:25)

These are the words that Elizabeth speaks after she conceives a child in her womb. A woman who was barren and advanced in years bears a child who is destined for great things. We hear of a similar story in today’s first reading from the Book of Judges. An angel appears to the wife of Manoah and tells her, “Though you are barren and have had no children, yet you will conceive and bear a son…this boy is to be consecrated to God from the womb. It is he who will begin the deliverance of Israel from the power of the Philistines.” (Judges 13:3, 5)

God allows things to happen according to His plan, not ours.  Even though we know this it is often hard to wait. Sometimes we pray for something for so long and it seems that our prayer goes unanswered or that God’s answer is “No”. I am sure both of these women longed to have a baby and prayed for it to happen. Elizabeth even saw her inability to have children a “disgrace before others.” I am sure that once they reached the age at which they were no longer able to have children that they quit even praying for that. Yet, both conceived after the time that it was humanly possible. But we know that divine intervention is not bound by time or space. My husband and I had no trouble conceiving our first child but we longed to have more children. It took a couple of years to conceive another child only to miscarry the baby two months later and then a couple years to conceive again only to miscarry at 5 months. This was a very difficult time for us and while I wanted to conceive another child, I wasn’t sure that I could bear another miscarriage. My pregnancy with my second son was filled with much anxiety and fear. Years later when I began to read scripture I came across what would become one of my favorite passages, “I prayed for this child, and the LORD granted my request. Now I, in turn, give him to the LORD; as long as he lives, he shall be dedicated to the LORD.” (1 Samuel 1:27-28)

God heard my plea just as he did Samuel’s mother, Hannah; Manoah’s wife and Elizabeth. He hears all of our prayers. He is aware of every tear that we shed. God knows us more intimately than we know ourselves yet sometimes we feel that he is so far away. So I continue to pray for God to increase my faith, to remind myself that when things seem impossible, nothing is impossible for God. I pray for a faith like Elizabeth who knew that God allows things to happen when he sees fit and according to his purpose. 

Rejoice!

Rejoice in the Lord always, again I say rejoice! This is what the priest sang during his homily today. Gaudete Sunday is a time for rejoicing. We are drawing closer to Christmas and our hearts are full of anticipation. Reflecting on God’s love for us brings joy to our hearts, not joy that is a fleeting emotion connected with an event that is happening in our life. “True joy is linked to our relationship with God. Those who have encountered Christ in their own lives feel a serenity and joy in their hearts that no one and no situation can take from them. True joy is a gift, born from the encounter with the living Person of Jesus.”  ~ Pope Benedict XVI

A good friend’s mother is dying of cancer. I spoke with her last week about how her mother’s cancer is progressing rapidly and no treatments are working. We prayed that she would be well enough to enjoy this last Christmas with her family but things took a turn for the worse early this morning. She was hospitalized with a complication that is life-threatening. My heart is hurting for my dear friend, her mother and her family. My heart is also hurting because it brings back memories of my mother’s death from cancer. The holidays are hard for my family and I remember the last Christmas we had with my mom. Her cancer was still in check but I think she knew that it would be our last Christmas together. 

Yet, even in our sadness, there is joy in knowing that she is with our King. There is joy in knowing that God was with her as she passed from this life to eternal life. There is joy in knowing that God has walked with us as we dealt with her death and continues to walk with us in our grief. There is joy in knowing that I have the strength to walk with my friend through this terrible time in her life because God is with us. God gives us the courage to face these difficult times instead of falling into despair. His love doesn’t prevent our hearts from breaking or prevent us from experiencing tragedy but it does allow us to remain hopeful and to always rejoice in the Lord, again I say rejoice!

“Rejoice always. Pray without ceasing. In all circumstances give thanks, for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus.”  (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)

Bringing Hope

 “’Original sin attempts to abolish fatherhood,…placing in doubt the truth about God who is Love and leaving man only with a sense of the master-slave relationship’ (Blessed John Paul II). John the Baptist, the new Elijah, removed our doubt and began to restore all things by turning our hearts back to the Father.”

~ Magnificat

We read in today’s first reading about Elijah. How he was destined “to put an end to wrath before the day of the LORD, to turn back the hearts of fathers toward their sons, and to re-establish the tribes of Jacob.” (Sirach 48:10)

God’s desire is for us to be in communion with him once again, to restore things to the way they were when he created man. Adam and Eve were in perfect communion with God until they chose to sin. They were deceived into believing that God was holding out on them, that they could actually be equal or maybe greater than God himself. The serpent was able to make them doubt God’s perfect love. Since that time God has been trying to restore that perfect relationship with man. In scripture we see over and over how God made a covenant with man and we, in our sinfulness, break the covenant. God’s entire relationship with mankind has been a series of covenants throughout the Old Testament and fulfilled by the New Covenant that is Jesus Christ. Each covenant expands on the previous one because mankind has broken his part of the promise. God always remains faithful, but we do not. And then God makes the ultimate sacrifice, he sends his only begotten Son to save us. During this Advent season we are called to meditate on the Incarnation of God himself. And each day we are called to make room for him in our hearts.

We have been hearing a lot about John the Baptist during the daily readings. He is the new Elijah and was placed on this earth to prepare the way for Jesus Christ. And now it is our turn. We are called to prepare the way for the second coming of our Lord. We are also called to go into our homes, schools, work place and communities and help the world understand that our Lord is coming to “judge the living and the dead.” But we aren’t called to stand on a street corner telling others to repent. We are called to help others understand the truth about the Lord’s coming through our actions. With the love of Christ, we are called to remove the mountains, clear away the stumbling blocks that prevent others from experiencing the love of Christ. We are called to be in the midst of the pain and suffering in our world just as Christ was. We are to unite ourselves with the humanity of Christ who humbly entered into the misery of life and sin out of love for each of us. When others are able to experience Christ here and now they will also begin to anticipate the coming of our Lord with hope. 

Such Faith

“Lord, I am not worthy to have you enter under my roof; only say the word and my servant will be healed… Amen, I say to you, in no one in Israel have I found such faith.” (Matthew 8:8, 10)

Obviously the centurion knew who Jesus was and what he was capable of doing because he approached Jesus with confidence, telling him about his servant at home who was suffering. The heart of the centurion was also full of love in order for him to seek out Jesus to heal his servant. His words to Jesus not only speak of his faith in the healing power of Jesus but also of his humility. Just as John the Baptist proclaimed, “I baptize with water; but there is one among you whom you do not recognize, the one who is coming after me, whose sandal strap I am not worthy to untie” (John 1:26-27); the centurion states that he is not worthy for Jesus to enter his home. This is the perfect example of the disposition our hearts need to be in, having faith enough to approach Christ and believing that he is capable of all things but also acknowledging that we are not worthy to even loosen the strap of his sandal.

This story also reminds me of the power of intercessory prayer and the impact our faith can have on one another. We don’t know if the servant believed in Jesus or if he knew that his master was going to seek Jesus to heal him. But it didn’t matter, it was the centurion’s faith that Jesus was amazed by and his faith that allowed his servant to be healed. We see this same result with the healing of the paralytic in Mark’s gospel. The paralytic is carried to Jesus by four men. They were unable to get near Jesus so they climbed on the roof, opened it up and lowered their friend down in front of Him. “When Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralytic, ‘Child, your sins are forgiven’… He rose, picked up his mat at once, and went away in the sight of everyone.” (Mark 2:5, 12) It was the faith that Jesus saw in these four men, that lead him to heal the paralytic.

Living out our faith and allowing other’s to see God working in our lives will help lead others to Christ. We are called to love one another and in doing so we need to pray for one another and ask the Lord to intervene even if the person doesn’t believe. Jesus said to the centurion, “You may go; as you have believed, let it be done for you.” (Matthew 8:13) And at that very moment his servant was healed. Those who witnessed this interaction between Jesus and the centurion came to understand that God’s healing love knows no boundaries. Jesus didn’t need to be in the presence of the servant in order to heal him. These people were forever changed after witnessing the power of the centurion’s faith. We, too, can forever change the lives of others by allowing them to witness our faith in Christ Jesus. 

Andrew’s Example

Today we celebrate the Feast of St. Andrew. Today in Matthew’s gospel we hear about the calling of Andrew and his brother, Peter. Jesus calls out to them, “Come after me, and I will make you fishers of men.” (Matthew 4:19) At once they left their nets and followed Christ. There was no hesitation, they left everything behind. In John’s gospel account of the first disciples, we hear about how Andrew was with John the Baptist and heard him cry out, “Behold the Lamb of God,” and Andrew followed Jesus. Andrew and another disciple spent the day with Jesus. Afterward, Andrew went straight to find his brother, Simon Peter, and tell him, “We have found the Messiah.” Andrew then took Peter to meet Jesus.

There is something about Christ that draws us to him that words cannot express. Oftentimes when someone speaks about their desire to become Catholic they can’t put it into words. My candidate for RCIA this year was raised in a Christian home that was very anti-Catholic so you can imagine the disdain she has been experiencing from family and friends since deciding to come into the Church. She speaks about being drawn to the Catholic Church and longing to be a part of it. Even those of us who are Catholic, at some point in our lives, we are called to a deeper relationship with Christ. For me it was 8 years ago when I went through Christ Renews His Parish (CRHP). I knew nothing about it but felt called to sign up for it. I can’t explain it but I know it was the Holy Spirit. During Jesus’ ministry he called many people to come follow him. He preached about how we are to live our lives as Christians. Yet many rejected Him. Jesus continues to call each of us to “follow me” but it is a personal decision that we each have to make. And we have to make this decision each and every day because there are so many things that try to pull us away from him. If we don’t recommit ourselves to him daily, and take time for him every day then we will begin to fall away from him.

I’m sure if someone were to ask Andrew why he dropped everything and followed Christ at that moment he wouldn’t be able to put it into words and certainly not in a way that would make sense to someone whose heart is not open to God. We often want explanations for things. Faith can’t be explained. It is a gift from God and allows us to trust in Him, to drop everything and believe that He will provide.  When we feel God tugging at our hearts to follow him, let us follow in Andrew’s footsteps and put down what we are doing, step out in faith and follow Him. 

Christ the King

Today we celebrate the Solemnity of Our Lord Jesus Christ, King of the Universe. Jesus Christ is King of the universe. He is, “the Alpha and the Omega, the one who is and who was and who is to come, the almighty.”  (Revelation 1:8) This Truth is unchanging. Jesus Christ is our King and he wants us to reign with him in his everlasting Kingdom. Through his death and Resurrection we have all been given eternal salvation. The questions we need to ask ourselves are, Is he King of my universe? Do I have my eyes fixed on Christ? Is this where my heart lies? Is being pleasing to Him and walking along the path of righteousness the focus of my life?

In today’s gospel, Jesus tells Pilate, “My kingdom does not belong to this world” (John 18:36). This world is not our home; this is not all there is. Jesus goes on to tell Pilate, “For this I was born and for this I came into the world, to testify to the truth. Everyone who belongs to the truth listens to my voice.” (John 18:37) This, too, is the reason we are here, to testify to the truth. We are to be Christ’s hands and feet until he comes again. The victory in Christ has already been won, and if we heed his voice, then we too will be victorious.

The focus in America has been about shopping, getting the best deals. All we heard about for weeks was Black Friday. People went to extremes, camping out in front of stores for days, to get the best deal on an object! The world would be a much better place if we put this much time and effort into our relationship with God and our fellow man. If we had as much zeal for our Lord as we doing for getting the best deal, the world would be on fire for Christ, our King. Next Sunday begins Advent. We prepare for the birth of our Lord and Savior. Our world has taken the focus off of Christ and put it on stuff. There are so many distractions and pressures to have more, do more, to be more. What change am I going to make in my life right now in order to make Christ the King of my universe? How am I going to prepare for His birth this Advent season instead of being caught up in the commercialization of the holidays? We don’t even call it Christmas anymore. And more importantly how am I preparing for His return. “When the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on earth?” (Matthew 18:8)

In Thanksgiving

“As he was entering a village, ten persons with leprosy met him. They stood at a distance from him and raised their voices, saying, ‘Jesus, Master! Have pity on us!’ And when he saw them, he said, ‘Go show yourselves to the priests.’ As they were going they were cleansed. And one of them, realizing he had been healed, returned, glorifying God in a loud voice; and he fell at the feet of Jesus and thanked him.

He was a Samaritan. Jesus said in reply, ‘Ten were cleansed, were they not? Where are the other nine?
Has none but this foreigner returned to give thanks to God?’ Then he said to him, ‘Stand up and go; your faith has saved you.’” (Luke 17:12-19)

Today’s gospel is perfect for today, Thanksgiving. So often we forget to give thanks for all the blessings that God has bestowed on us. Only one of the ten people healed of their leprosy bothered to go back and thank Jesus for healing him. Why did the others not go with him? Did they feel they were too busy? Did they feel a sense of entitlement and thus there was no need to give thanks to God?

Today is set aside for our nation to give thanks to God. In 1789, George Washington’s Thanksgiving Proclamation begins with the following words, “Whereas it is the duty of all nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey His will, to be grateful for His benefits, and humbly to implore His protection and favour.”  We are one nation under God but this no longer seems to be the case. Our faith is one of our greatest gifts but so many people refuse to accept this gift. If we don’t believe in God how can we be grateful? Everything we have and everything we are is from our heavenly Father. His hand is involved in everything good. If we don’t believe in God then we make gods of so many things. Our pride guides our steps and is seen as a strength instead of the root of all sin. We become selfish and our hearts become hard. We don’t feel that we need to help those in need and often look down on them. Our world becomes a dark place.

In order to break free of this we need to be grateful. We need to recognize all the blessings we receive each and every day. If just once a day we stop and list two things that we are thankful for, our stony hearts will begin to be replaced with love. This one simple gesture will lead us to be more aware of our blessings and also recognize those in need. We begin to share our gifts and our hearts grow even more. This is the cycle that we want to encourage and allow to flourish. We become like the Samaritan in today’s gospel; glorifying God in a loud voice, falling to our knees and giving thanks for the healing and blessings in our own life.

Help Me to See

“’What do you want me to do for you?’ He replied, ‘Lord, please let me see.” (Luke 18:41)

Open my eyes, Lord, help me to see. Just as the blind man in today’s gospel shouts out, “Jesus, Son of David, have pity on me!” (Luke 18:38) I too cry out, have pity on me! Lord, open not only my eyes but also my heart. Help me to know you are near. Help me to be at peace and to cherish each moment. You are with me in each moment and you use everything for good. You are with me even as I search for love and peace in places and people that will never love me as you love me. They can never match your goodness and glory.

 “God himself is eyes to those who become blind to see him, and he directs them so as not to go astray, or rather it is more accurate to say that God takes them where they would not know how to go even if they could see. As the Lord says through Isais: ‘I will bring forth the blind by a road unknown to them and make them walk in paths they did not know; I will light the shadows before them’.” (Fr. Francisco De Osuna, O.F.M)

Even in our blindness you are there leading us in ways we can never imagine. My ways are often not your ways. You are all-knowing and you want to guide me along your path. But my loneliness often keeps me in darkness, it drives me to seek love and I think it is your love that I have found but often it isn’t and it causes me heartache. Open my eyes Lord to see you in all the beauty that you surround me with. Help me to be present to you, to quiet my anxious heart and to bask in your glory. 

Another Chance

God is so merciful. He continually gives us the opportunity to be Christ to others even when we have failed. I have been struggling with something that happened at work. I was given the opportunity to be Christ to a hurting family and I was a coward instead. This young man had been dealing with cancer for 10 of his 18 years. He had a period where it was in remission and then recurred in his lungs. It did not respond to any of the treatments that we had to offer but it settled down and was dormant for a long time. But it was just a sleeping giant that roared awake about six months ago and spread like wildfire. The lesions in his lungs grew rapidly and lesions began to appear in his brain. As quickly as they could remove them, another one appeared. It was obvious that this was a losing battle. This young man could be difficult and was sometimes belligerent. He could also be sweet but you never knew what you might get when you walked in the room. I often expected the worse and was surprised when he was kind. His last visit to the hospital revealed yet another tumor in his brain and he was set up with hospice. He wanted to die at home, not in the hospital. I knew he wouldn’t be there long and instead of going to see him and his parents, offering them support, I stayed away. My pride kept me away; I didn’t want to be rejected. I told myself that his favorite doctor was there for them and that is who they really wanted at their side. This young man died yesterday and I never had the opportunity to be present to them again.

I have been doing this for a long time, how could this happen? Why does my fear and pride still get in the way? My heart hurts for failing this family and failing God. He gave me an opportunity to be Christ and I turned my back. In my prayers God has reminded me that this is hard. It’s never easy to step into such an intimate place with a family no matter how long I have been doing this. And it will continue to be hard and the only way I’ll get through this is with Him guiding me. 

There is another young man in the hospital dying with almost the same story. He is also fighting an awful sarcoma that he has had for 9 years that has spread to his lungs and now his brain. He is an amazing young man but his mother can be very difficult to deal with and I found myself wanting to avoid her instead of reaching out to this family so I have been praying for courage and wisdom to do His work. I’ve stepped out in faith trusting that God would place his words on my lips. Each time I’ve visited them this week it has been a blessing. We’ve talked, laughed, cried and sat in silence resting in His care. This young man has an amazing faith and knows that soon he will be with his King. I thank God for giving me another chance to do it right. I thank him for the gift of this work he has called me to do even though it is almost unbearable some days. It is a privilege to be a part of such an intimate experience where heaven and earth collide. 

Playing it Safe

In today’s first reading the widow from Zarephath was going to make a final meal for her and her son before they were to die from starvation, yet she was willing to offer that to Elijah the prophet when asked. Her jar of flour and jug of oil did not run dry for an entire year, “until the day when the LORD sends rain upon the earth.” (1 Kings 17:14) The jar of flour became the Bread of Life, Jesus, who provides for those who make their lives a total gift of self to him.

We want God to do great things but we don’t provide him the opportunity, we play it safe just in case He doesn’t come through for us.  When Jesus sent out his twelve disciples, he told them, “take nothing for the journey, neither walking stick, nor sack, nor food, nor money, and let no one take a second tunic.” (Luke 9:2) Jesus was forcing his disciples to trust him. God would have to come through for them because they had nothing else to fall back on.  Complete trust takes courage; it makes us vulnerable and makes us uncomfortable. We like finding refuge in what we already have rather than in what we hope God will provide. But following Christ calls for us to leave everything behind and follow Him, trusting even when we do not know where he is leading us. God wants to show us how he loves and cares for us. He wants to be our refuge.

Peter was willing to step out on the water with the waves crashing around him. He was the only one who was courageous enough to take that leap of faith. And when he was overcome with fear and began to sink, Jesus came through for him, he rescued Peter. We all have something in our lives that keeps us holding back, we are too afraid to step out of our comfort zone and let God be God and show us his majesty and great love for us. What will it take for us to quit playing it safe?

My Father’s House

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 Today is the Feast of the Dedication of the Lateran Basilica in Rome. “The basilica of Saint John Lateran, the cathedral of the Pope as bishop of Rome, is called the ‘mother church’ of Rome and the world. As such, it is a visible symbol of the universal Church. It calls us to look toward the house of God in the new Jerusalem toward which the earthly church is the pilgrimage.”  ~ Magnificat

We are the Church, our bodies are a temple of the Lord and the Spirit of God dwells in us. Do we need these beautiful buildings in order for the Church to go on? Would destroying a building be a blow to the Church, scattering all who worshipped in that place elsewhere? No, oftentimes we see on the news that when a natural disaster has destroyed a church through fire, tornados or other means that the people actually draw closer to one another and closer to Christ. Yet, these buildings are important. They are a visible symbol of the Church. It is on these altars that bread and wine become the Body and Blood of our Lord, Jesus Christ. It is in these buildings that a man and woman are joined as one in Holy Matrimony, where we are baptized, freed from sin and reborn as sons and daughters of God. We become members of Christ and incorporated into the Church. It is a place where we can sit in the presence of our Lord and put aside all the distractions of the world.

“He found in the temple area those who sold oxen, sheep and doves, as well as the moneychangers seated there. He made a whip out of cords and drove them all out of the temple area…he said, ‘Take these out of here, and stop making my Father’s house a marketplace.’” (John 2:14-16)

First and foremost our churches need to be a house of prayer and worship. We need to be reverent and remember that we are there to partake in the Sacrifice of the Mass. So many Christian churches have removed the altar from their church and replaced it with a stage. The pews have been replaced by theater seats and people are there to be entertained. The Mass is the most sacred act of worship that we can participate in. It was instituted by Jesus Christ at the Last Supper and will continue to the end of time. My prayer is that we all may come to know and love Jesus Christ who both commands and invites us to encounter Him in this very special way. That we fall in love with the Mass all over again and seek a deeper understanding of this beautiful gift.

Encountering Christ

I started a new book study a few weeks ago with a few women from my parish. It is a book study more than a bible study because we aren’t just studying scripture, we are taking scripture and through prayer, allowing God to speak to us. This study helps us to have an encounter with Christ through prayer. We pray using Lectio Divina individually and as a group. It helps us to see God working in our lives and helps us make changes that will help us be more Christ-like. It is similar to what I was doing with the daily readings but this study focuses on a different virtue in each chapter and all the scripture focuses on that one virtue. The second chapter that we just finished tonight was on forgiveness.

There is scripture throughout the Old and New Testament that shows us what forgiveness truly means. Jeremiah tells us in verse 31:34 that we come to know the Lord through His forgiveness of our sins. I hadn’t thought about that before but it makes perfect sense. We experience the perfect love of God though his forgiveness. As we come to know the Lord more and more we want to please him and we want to imitate him. We realize that it is only through his grace that we can forgive the unforgivable.

God tells us that we will have trouble in this world, “I have told you this so that you might have peace in me. In the world you will have trouble, but take courage, I have conquered the world.” (John 16:33) We know this but yet we are shocked and blindsided when others betray us. Sometimes it knocks us to our knees and then our unforgiveness keeps us there. We want to nurse our wounds. We may try to numb the pain with many things but none of them work. Christ paid the price for all the sins of the world, those that have been inflicted on us and those we inflict on others. When we rise above the hurt and choose (and it is a choice) to forgive as Christ did, we provide an opportunity for others to receive God’s grace as well. The peace I feel after receiving the Sacrament of Reconciliation is the same peace that is offered to others when I forgive them. And it sets me free because unforgiveness always keeps us in bondage.

“In refusing to forgive our brothers and sisters, our hearts are closed and their hardness makes them impervious to the Father’s merciful love; but in confessing our sins, our hearts are opened to his grace.”

~ Catechism of the Catholic Church 2839-2840

Forgiveness

“Brothers and sisters: Be kind to one another, compassionate, forgiving one another as God has forgiven you in Christ.” (Ephesians 4:32)

I am to forgive others as God has forgiven me. This seems impossible. God has been so merciful and has forgiven me for so many sins. And at times I struggle to forgive myself and accept His forgiveness. People say you have to love yourself before you can love others. Is it also true with forgiveness? Do I have to learn to forgive myself before I can forgive others? I have always found it easier to love others more so than myself and I think of myself as someone who is merciful and forgives others easily. Over the years as I have learned to love myself I have found that I have so much more to give to others. I can love others more completely and I am not afraid to receive their love. Hopefully the same will be true regarding forgiveness because I realized yesterday that I still struggle with it. I have trouble letting go of the hurts that have been inflicted on me. I thought I was doing pretty good letting go of a past hurt. I’ve purposefully avoided situations where I may run into this person so that God can heal these wounds but just the mention of his name by someone yesterday at RCIA caused my body to stiffen and my jaw to tighten up. I had to walk away for a moment. My reaction and recovery was mild compared to six months ago but it still surprised me that the pain was still there as well as bitterness in my heart. It is obvious that I have not forgiven him completely.

No matter what the world tells us about forgiveness, walk away and wash your hands of anyone who hurts you; it’s ok to hurt others if they have hurt you. An eye for an eye no longer applies when God is the center of our life. Turn the other cheek, forgive 7 x 70, these are God’s commands so we must empty ourselves of the bitterness, anger, hurt and sadness that we often feel when someone has done wrong to us. And allow the love of Christ to flow from us. Forgiveness is impossible without God’s grace. It takes humility and courage to forgive others and we receive this strength from God alone. He makes the impossible, possible.

“It flies in the face of all your pride, it moves away the mad inside, it’s always anger’s own worst enemy. Even when the jury and the judge say you got a right to hold a grudge it’s the whisper in your ear saying, ‘set it free.’ Show me how to love the unlovable, show me how to reach the unreachable, help me now to do the impossible, forgiveness.”  ~ Forgiveness by Matthew West

Priesthood Sunday

Today is Priesthood Sunday. It is an opportunity to give thanks to God for the gift of the priesthood.  “Only a validly ordained Catholic priest has the power (bestowed by Christ through the apostolic ministry of the Catholic Church) to turn bread and wine into the Body and Blood of Jesus Christ, and to absolve sins.  Acting in the person of Christ as mediators between God and man, priests continue Christ’s work of redemption on earth.  The Catholic priesthood therefore is an extension of Christ’s perfect Priesthood; ‘Only Christ is the true priest, the others being only his ministers.’” (CCC 1545) 

It is important that we pray for our priests to receive extra grace from God to carry out the work they have been called to do. I thank God for all of our priests but especially those that have personally touched my life. I love this devotion that I came across a few years ago in Magnificat.

  

“To live in the midst of the world

with no desire for its pleasure…

To be a member of every family yet belonging to none…

To share all sufferings; to penetrate all secrets;

to heal all wounds…

To daily go from men to God to offer Him their petitions…

To return from God to men to offer them His hope…

To have a heart of fire for charity and

a heart of bronze for chastity…

To bless and be blest forever, O God,

what a life and it is yours,

O Priest of Jesus Christ!”

Father Henri Dominique Lacordaire, O.P.

Far More

“Now to him who is able to accomplish far more than all we ask or imagine, by the power at work within us, to him be glory in the Church and in Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.”  (Ephesians 3:20-21)

Anything is possible for God, he can do all things. He can do anything that we could possibly imagine and things far beyond our imagination. I think when people read this scripture they often think about the grand things that God can do, the big miracles he has done such as parting the Red Sea, feeding the 5,000 with two fish and five loaves of bread, or raising his friend Lazarus from the dead. But for me, the things that amaze me are the “little things” or at least what the world considers to be little or insignificant. I am overwhelmed and in awe that God loves me, he knows the depth of my heart, and still loves me. He is aware of every tear that I shed and they are precious to him. “My wanderings you have noted; are my tears not stored in your vial, recorded in your book?” (Psalm 56:9) He hears the unspoken prayer for wisdom and compassion that arises from my heart each time that I prepare to go into a room at the hospital and care for one of my patients. He hears my plea for courage to walk into the room of a family who has recently found out that the cancer has spread in their son’s brain and there are no other treatments to offer them. He gives me the strength to swallow my pride and ask for forgiveness for being short with my husband. He gives me the courage to lean into this relationship instead of pulling away and allowing the distance between us to grow which is so much easier to do.

The fact that God does all of these things for me and for each one of us is amazing to me. He never grows weary of our constant requests for our desires to be fulfilled with the things of this world. He never grows frustrated when we constantly try to do things our way and is always there when we realize that we can’t do this on our own and cry out to him. He is always there to wrap his loving arms around us when life is hard and we are so weary. God’s goodness is far beyond anything that we can comprehend. We need to believe this and surrender to him. We need to stop putting limits on God. It is our lack of faith that prevents us from seeing all of God’s splendor. We hear in Mark’s gospel that Jesus “was not able to perform any mighty deeds there, apart from curing a few sick people by laying his hands on them. He was amazed at their lack of faith.” (Mark 6:5-6)

Heavenly Father, I ask that you increase our faith! Help us to be open to your glory and in awe of your wonderful deeds. Open our eyes to the beauty around us and to see your majesty. Free our minds from our narrowness especially that we place on you. And we pray, as St. Paul did, that we may “have the strength to comprehend with all the holy ones what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, so that [we] may be filled with all the fullness of God.” Amen. (Ephesians 3:18-19) 

One in Christ

“So then you are no longer strangers and sojourners, but you are fellow citizens with the holy ones and members of the household of God, built upon the foundation of the Apostles and prophets, with Christ Jesus himself as the capstone. Through him the whole structure is held together and grows into a temple sacred in the Lord; in him you also are being built together into a dwelling place of God in the Spirit.”  (Ephesians 2:19-22)

In RCIA we are learning about the authority of the Church and how Christ is the capstone. We delved into scripture to see how upon Peter, the rock, Christ’s church was built. This isn’t just a theory or something that Catholics say is true, it is the Truth. We see in scripture that Jesus specifically tells Peter, “And so I say to you, you are Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church.” (Matthew 16:18) And prior to his ascension, he tells them to, “Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations.” (Matthew 28:19) The Catholic Church has continued to grow because it is through Christ that “the whole structure is held together and grows.” The Catholic Church is the only one that has stood the test of time. Every one of the over 33,000 Protestant denominations can trace their roots back to the Catholic Church. Every Christian was Catholic, even Martin Luther, who rejected the teaching of the Church and started his own church, before the Protestant Revolt.

Jesus Christ is the same, yesterday, today and forever. The Truth does not change with the times, it doesn’t conform to what man thinks is best. It doesn’t change its definition of marriage or its values to accommodate the desires of man in all his brokenness. We are called to live as Christ lived and this is a struggle. There are so many forces out there trying to pull or push us from the Truth. And there are also the sinful tugs from our own heart that tempt us to quench these desires with things of this world. Christ knows how hard it is because he himself endured all these things and so he gives us the grace that is needed to withstand all of these things. In today’s gospel we are urged to be vigilant at all times. To “gird your loins and light your lamps and be like servants who await their master’s return from a wedding, ready to open immediately when he comes and knocks.” (Luke 12:35-36) He is coming again, as he promised, and he hopes to find us ready. The gospel also tells us that for those who the master finds vigilant on his arrival, “he will gird himself, have them recline at table, and proceed to wait on them.” (12:37) Jesus Christ will serve those who he finds ready; he wants to wait on us, his good and faithful servants!

Nothing Goes Unnoticed

“Are not five sparrows sold for two small coins? Yet not one of them has escaped the notice of God. Even the hairs of your head have all been counted. Do not be afraid. You are worth more than many sparrows. (Luke 12:6-7)

When life is overwhelming and I feel like no one would notice if I just disappeared, this gospel speaks the truth. Not only does God know everything about each one of us from the number of hairs on our head to the thoughts that race through our minds and the fear that reigns in our hearts. We mean something to Him! We are precious in his eyes.

“There is nothing concealed that will not be revealed, nor secret that will not be known. Therefore whatever you have said in the darkness will be heard in the light…” (Luke 12:2-3)

When I read and meditate on this gospel I think what it is saying is that the parts of ourselves that we try to hide from others, ourselves and God will be brought into the light and the real person that we are will be known to all. We make ourselves look good to the world but the inside is full of evil doings. Jesus denounced the Pharisees, “Woe to you scribes and Pharisees, you hypocrites. You cleanse the outside of cup and dish, but inside they are full of plunder and self-indulgence.” (Matthew 23:25) We do the same thing; we polish the outside, that which the world will see, but what is inside defiles us. We need to do everything possible to make things right with God, not the world. The things of this world are passing but the state of our souls will decide eternity. So we need to work on purifying those parts of ourselves that we keep hidden so that people will think we are good. I went to confession yesterday and confessed my prideful, selfish, unforgiving acts of sinfulness and felt renewed afterward, ready to take on the world with my armor of Christ. But a part of me wanted to tell the priest that I really am a good person, he just has to hear the dirt. I wanted him to see the “polished” part of me yet in truth he was seeing the better part, a soul whose sins had be absolved by the grace of God.

Other times I think that it is saying that God knows what is happening in the darkness. He knows of each of those times that we were abused or someone wronged us. He knows about the times that we have cried out in the darkness because of fear or pain and our cries reached to the heavens but all we felt was abandonment and silence. He will bring to light all of these things that happened and make everything right. He will show us that he was with us all along, that we were never alone and that during most of those dark moments he was carrying us through just as he carried the cross to Calvary to die for all the sins of mankind.

Lord, help me to be at peace and know that one day everything will be brought into the light and we will see things as you see them in all your glory. Amen. 

Comfort and Peace

  

“And then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:7)

 These past few days have been a struggle for my community, especially for our teens. One of the football players from our high school was at the lake this weekend. He and his friends were jumping from the cliffs and something happened when he went into the water because he came up and then quickly went back under and never resurfaced. They still have not found his body. He was popular and a great young man. Not that his life is any more important than the other teens but it does bring more attention to it especially in the media. The death of a young person is so difficult to understand but the fact that they haven’t found his body causes more turmoil. Some are saying that he is dead; leaving no room for the possibility that somehow beyond all reasoning he is alive. And some are grasping onto hope, praying for a miracle. Finding his body would at least make it more real and bring closure to his family and friends.

And then to add to this grief and sorrow, we found out last night that another teen from the high school has died, he committed suicide yesterday. There wasn’t much information about it last night but there was much talk about it on Facebook. My teenage son is hurting, he didn’t know either of these young men personally but he knew one of the siblings and it hits so close to home when it is in your own high school. Andrew knows how fragile life is because he has heard me talk about the tragic deaths of my two brothers when I was young and he has also heard about the deaths of many children over the years with me being a pediatric oncology nurse. For most of his friends this is their first exposure to death.

Dear Lord, I ask that you pour out your wisdom and compassion on the adults of my community so that we may be a source of strength, love and comfort for the families and the teens that have been affected by these tragedies. Let our hope in the promise of eternal life be visible for them and wrap these hurting families in your loving arms and fill their hearts with your peace. Amen.

“He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there shall be no more death or mourning, wailing or pain, for the old order has passed away.” (Revelation 21:4)

His Desire

 “If you want me to rest, 

I desire it for love;

If to labor,

I will die working:

Sweet Love say

Where, how and when

What do you want from me?

Calvary or Tabor give me,

Desert for fruitful land;

As Job in suffering

Or John at Your breast;

Barren or fruited vine,

Whatever be Your will:

What do you want of me?” 

~ St. Teresa of Avila

Today is the Memorial of St. Teresa of Avila. In Magnificat, there was an excerpt from her poem, “In the Hands of God”. Above are just two verses of the excerpt but the poem is a reflection of the life she lived. Whatever the Lord wanted of her is what she wanted. If enduring great suffering as Job experienced is what the Lord asked of her, she accepted it readily. If the suffering was for the Lord it would not be in vain but redemptive not only for herself but for others as well. Just as Jesus was willing to suffer for our sins, as his disciples, we are also called to share in His suffering for the sake of our brothers and sisters. Jesus gave suffering redemptive value by selflessly accepting suffering in order to free us from sin. When we choose to accept suffering in a quiet and humble manner, our humility then opens our hearts to accept God’s grace. Through redemptive suffering we can bring healing to the world just as Christ’s suffering put an end to death.

As his disciples, God doesn’t just offer us suffering and Calvary but also the glory of Tabor. In these moments of grace the Lord reveals himself to us. Just as his apostles got a glimpse of heaven during the Transfiguration, God gives us glimpses of the wonder and awe of things to come. Oh, to be John, the beloved disciple at the breast of Jesus, who rests his head on the beating heart of our Lord and Savior. But these aren’t just moments that we read about in scripture, these are graces that God bestows on us as well. We are his beloved sons and daughters and he wants to comfort us, provide us with a place to rest our head and to be renewed in the love of Christ. But no matter what life holds for us, we need to embrace each blessing and suffering and realize that it is what God desires for us at that moment and that he will provide us with the grace to live as faithful stewards, just as St. Teresa of Avila lived her life. 

What Must I Do?

“As Jesus was setting out on a journey, a man ran up, knelt down before him, and asked him, ‘Good teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?’” (Mark 10:17)

Today’s gospel is about the rich man who asks Jesus what he must do to inherit eternal life. He tells Jesus that he has observed the commandments from his youth. Jesus tells him, “You are lacking in one thing. Go, sell what you have, and give to the poor and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, follow me.” (Mark 10:21) Just like the rich man, we all have something that we are enslaved to that keeps us from following Jesus completely. Jesus asked the rich man why he called him good. “No one is good but God alone.”  The rich man knew there was more to obtaining eternal life than following the commandments. This is why he approached Jesus. He knew that Jesus was the Messiah and that only through Him is eternal life possible. We must have this same belief. We must believe that it is only God who gives us the strength to be holy. When we try to do it on our own our work is in vain. We must humbly present ourselves to God, just as the rich man did, and ask him, “What must I do to inherit eternal life?” God will reveal to us what needs to be done. Jesus will look upon us with love, just as he did the rich man, and show us the way.

I was in Portland, Oregon this past week for a conference on End of Life Care. The last day I was there a woman got on the elevator wearing a t-shirt that read, “Friendly Atheist”.  She was part of a large group, Freedom from Religion Foundation, which was also attending a conference at the same hotel. They had almost 900 people attending the conference and almost everyone on the elevator was part of that group. One of the things that came to my mind was that I was glad that I wasn’t wearing my crucifix. What a coward I was. Was I afraid that someone would say something rude? Was I afraid they would question me about my faith? Whatever the reason, I failed Christ. I denied Him. Just like Peter did. When my mom died three years ago, at one point I was angry at God, I was angry that she was in excruciating pain and that we could not alleviate it. When I went to confession, the priest told me that God had put my feet to the fire and that I had failed. This wasn’t true. My anger was a normal reaction that almost anyone would have if their loved was suffering. I hadn’t failed that day but I certainly did on Saturday.  I like to think that I am a strong Catholic who is willing to die for my faith, but in that moment all I was is a coward.

“Therefore, if you wish God to give you a new heart, you must first of all amend your deeds, and then lament your faults and accuse yourself of your sins. Do not extenuate your defects, but judge yourself justly; let not your self-love blind you, but when conscience accuses you of wrong, do not forget it, but keep it before your eyes and manifest it to Jesus Christ, your Savior and Physician.”  ~ St. John of Avila

Proclaiming His Name

“The task Christ gave us is to proclaim his name.” ~ Monsignor Luigi Giussani 

Sometimes we think we are meant to make everything better; that if we follow in Christ’s footsteps we will say the right thing to comfort those who are hurting. When we seek forgiveness and forgive others that our relationship with them will be mended or if we pray hard enough our loved ones will be healed.

We are called to proclaim Christ’s name and live a Christian life so that others are drawn to Him, so that they may live in the light of Christ. Our world is broken and no matter how loving we are, the perfect words to say to those who are hurting don’t always come. Sometimes our attempts at reconciliation are rejected and no matter how hard we pray, our loved ones aren’t healed and sometimes they die. When Christ was on this earth he didn’t cure all the sick, bring sight to all the blind or bring all the lame to their feet. Christ came to reconcile us to his Father. And until he comes again and we see him face to face, seated at the right hand of God, the world will remain broken.

Proclaiming Christ to others helps them to share in the anticipated joy of all Christians. It is our hope in God’s promise that allows us to weather the storms of our life. When others see how Christ sustains us through all of our struggles and sorrow and that we remain faithful, they, too, will learn to trust Christ and put their hope in Him. I admire people that have a peace about them especially when life is hard. I have come to realize that this peace is from Christ. There is a priest where I attend daily Mass who exudes peace and I want this same peace. I won’t find it by having this priest in my life. I will have this peace from Christ alone. The reason I can experience this peace is because of the people in my life who proclaimed Christ to me. They helped me to enter into my own relationship with Him. I know that life will continue to be hard. I don’t understand all the suffering that I see at work caring for these kids that are battling cancer. But I don’t need to understand it. I just need to remain faithful and proclaim Christ to all those he places in my life.

“The peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. Keep on doing what you have learned and received and heard and seen in me. Then the God of peace will be with you.” (Philippians 4:7-9)