Yes, I Believe

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“Let it be done for you according to your faith.”

These words seem so simple, the blind men believe that Jesus can heal them and they are healed. But as I reflect on them, they aren’t so simple. They require us to be participants in our journey here on earth. Sometimes we pray for God to do this or do that. We ask and we expect that he will do it. And if he doesn’t sometimes we get angry at God or we may turn away from God. But sometimes we are the problem. We prevent God from allowing us to see. We are used to the darkness of our sin and don’t want things to change. Sometimes he shows us what we need to do but we don’t want to do it. We don’t want to have to do the work.

I remember meditating on this very Scripture a few years ago. My husband and I were having some difficulties in our marriage and I was at a point where I wasn’t sure that I wanted to continue being married. We were meeting with our priest for some counseling and we were at a crossroad.  As I meditated on these very words, God was asking me, “Do you believe that I can do this?” And I had to really ask myself this question. Did I believe that my marriage could change? Did I want my marriage to work? Was I willing to try again? Was I willing to do the work to make this happen? God doesn’t wave a magic wand and suddenly things are better. The problem that kept coming up over and over and over in our marriage wasn’t going to magically disappear. We were going to have to do the work and more importantly I was going to have to have a change of heart. I had to have faith that God could change my heart and that I would fall in love with my husband again.  And as I began to allow God to soften my heart, I became hopeful. I was willing to do the work and to do things the way that God was asking me to do them instead of the way I was trying to make it work. Because of God’s love for me, my faith grew and I now believe that we will remain married until death do us part. I know that no matter what life holds for us, no matter how difficult life may be, we will remain strong in our marriage because of our trust in Christ. We recently celebrated our 25^th wedding anniversary with a Mass and a small celebration at our home afterward. I couldn’t think of a better way to celebrate our anniversary than by giving thanks to our heavenly Father with our children and dear friends. I don’t know if we will be blessed with another day, another year or another decade of marriage but I will cherish each and every moment.