Complete Dependence

“Amen, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will not enter the Kingdom of heaven. Whoever becomes humble like this child is the greatest in the Kingdom of heaven. And whoever receives one child such as this in my name receives me.” (Matthew 18:3-5)

Just as children are completely dependent on and trust their parents, we must do the same in our relationship with God. When we are humble we let go of our pride, our selfishness and put complete trust in our heavenly Father. Humility is a great virtue and “above all it represents the very way in which God himself behaves. It is the path chosen by Christ. It is not about giving up anything, but about courage. It’s not about defeat, but it’s the result of love’s victory over selfishness, and of grace over sin.  Following Christ and imitating Mary, we must have the courage of humility; we must entrust ourselves with humility to the Lord because only then can we become docile instruments in his hands, and have the permission to do great things.”(Pope Benedict XIV)

I love working with children. They are so open and honest and tell it like it is. They sometimes give us a glimpse into their home life that their parents wish we didn’t know. When we have to do something to a child that they don’t like, such as giving them a shot, and profanity comes flying out of the mouth of a three year old, you know that this is what they are exposed to at home. The parent is often embarrassed and makes a comment about not knowing where they learned to speak like that.

We have to do terrible things to these children in order to kill their cancer, we access their port with a needle; we stick needles in their back to get bone marrow or give chemotherapy into their spinal fluid. We infuse medicine into them that makes their hair fall out and causes them to be nauseated and vomit. We make their parents cry. But surprisingly, and often very quickly, they realize that we are doing this not to be mean but to make them better. We are on their side and we love them. It breaks my heart when they say “thank you” after having just started an IV on them or done something that was painful. Of course we also do things to help. We use numbing cream before an injection. We put them to sleep before doing a bone marrow aspirate or spinal tap and give them medicine to hopefully prevent the nausea and vomiting.

Sometimes it is that way with God. We have to endure things that are horrible. We can’t see the big picture and can’t imagine that anything good will come out of this. But we have to trust him and believe that it is all for His glory. We have to quit fighting and surrender our will to his. He wants to heal us and he does these things because he loves us.